In celebration of 100+ Fans on Facebook, we will take a look back at the worst films ever reviewed on Wade’s Thoughts, and get a good laugh, just don’t watch any of these, or you’ll probably end up punching yourself in the face.
*Click on the title of each movie to read the full review (If you dare)
~Movies With a (0) Score~
A new low for Adam Sandler and a new low for film making. You’ll have more fun playing a game of Old Maid with your own sister, who likely isn’t as obnoxious and annoying as “Jill”. I would say that watching Jack & Jill is the equivalent of eating a Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwich covered in mold, that’s sat out for three weeks. Jack and Jill is bottom of the barrel, worst of the worst, and God have mercy on your soul if you’ve watched it.
No, Sarah Jessica Parker, we will never know how you do it, how you continue to make god-awful movies with such consistency. Maybe Sarah should re-think her career choice, because this is the last straw. Not only is Sarah bad, everything about this movie is bad. You also get to see Pierce Brosnan’s career disintegrate before your eyes. Is it just me or does every other man on the face of the Earth want to see Sarah Jessica Parker fall on her face in a pair of heels in the street? Maybe then we wouldn’t have to endure her hideous movies every year.
Daniel Craig has disowned Dream House, you should too. I would rather be forced to vomit for 12 straight hours than watch this horrendous piece of garbage.
Famous for receiving a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes, Love Wedding Marriage is abysmal on ever possible level, and should be avoided at all costs. Instead of watching it, you should go break your face on the bathroom mirror, because I would rather do that then sit through this awful mess again.
Jennifer Aniston is at it again, ruining everything she touches. In her defense, it’s not just her, everything about The Bounty Hunter is terrible. Words will never be able to describe just how bad this movie is.
Trust me, you don’t want to hear about the Morgans, as a matter of fact, no one does, because this movie is an absolute and utter failure in every aspect. It is the mere definition of “bore fest”. It has no substance or purpose whatsoever.
~Movies With a (0.5) Score~
Sitting through Letters To Juliet is like a miniature prison sentence. I wanted to turn it off at least 30 times because it was so awful. I had a party afterwards in celebration for being free from the torture this movie provided.
The truth isn’t the only thing that’s ugly here. First, you have Katherine Heigl, who pretty much curses any movie she’s in. Second, you have Gerard Butler, who’s famous for being the obnoxious jerk in these types of films. Third, you have an utterly absurd premise which translates into a tiring story. Lastly, throw in every rom-com cliche possible, then you get The Ugly Truth, which I assume is the fact that no one should watch this movie, ever.
~Movies With a (1.0) Score~
With the most absurd story you will ever see in a movie, a thousand action movie cliches, uneven pacing and horrible acting, not even Taylor Lautner’s six pack can save this sorry excuse for a film.
Nicholas Sparks dishes out yet another horrid, laughable, cliched mess of a movie that will have the teenage girls sobbing of how “sad” the story is, while everyone else will be crying because they have to endure the torture. Zac Efron is an absolute joke here as well, acting as eye candy for the ladies than actually trying to put on a good acting performance. His facial expression is nearly the same in every scene, which looks like a model trying to pose for a photo shoot. Not to mention, the chemistry between the leads is hardly existent.
Ryan Reynold’s pompous attitude mixed with constant foul language and awful story telling make The Change Up unenjoyable from start to finish. Avoid it at all costs.
Despite a talented cast, How Do You Know is like a lost puppy trying to find it’s way. It’s more confused than anything else. It doesn’t even remotely come close to answering it’s title name’s question, and doesn’t offer anything else either, making it void in every way.
Let’s just hope The Little Fockers don’t have more little Fockers to continue the family tradition, because this series just went down the toilet. Instead of trying to make a funny, enjoyable third entry, the film makers decided to make it a quick cash in for all involved. It’s tiring, boring and never should have been made. This is a disgrace to Meet The Parents and a slap in the face to fans of the series.
Okay, here’s the plan, don’t watch this movie. Here’s the back up plan: If you are somehow forced to watch this movie, immediately jump out of the nearest window when the opening credit start to roll. The film has no purpose, no redeeming qualities, and no depth. It’s eye candy for both sexes wrapped up into a nice little package full of things like a bad story, boring plot, absurd premise and horrible acting, served to you by a “shoot yourself” annoying, Jennifer Lopez.
Dear John, thank you for being the most cliche, boring, and horrible chick flick of all time. Your legacy will live on in the hearts of teenage girls everywhere, who will most likely realize how stupid they were for liking such an epic failure of a film in their early days. Thank you for showing us what true love is, and making them believe that this is actually what it’s like, so when they actually get in relationships, their expectations will be so high that nothing will ever live up to their standards, which were ingrained into their heads by you. Thank you for absolutely nothing, but a terrible excuse of a love story, candy coated with two attractive leads. Thank you John, for absolutely nothing. Sincerely, the human race.
Valentine’s Day is a perfect example of a ton of talented actor’s talents being thrown in a garbage can, with no remorse or shame whatsoever. You’re better off spending Valentine’s Day alone with your dog, sobbing while reading love letters from your ex girlfriends. You would be a whole lot happier doing that than enduring such a painful movie like this.